Osler's Razor

Complete prosecution of those that have more than 10 items in a 10 items or less lane!
 

This is one of my favorite school house rock videos...and I know them all! This one is in a 3 way tie with (not necessarily in ranking order):
1). Lolly, Lolly, Lolly get your adverbs here
2). The preamble one..."we the people..." (I won't sing)....
3). Super planet Janet...the galaxy girl...

And then there is that 4th superfecta pic....conjunction junction, what's your function....

I'd box these four any day if I were at the horse track....
 

A ban on government deficits.
 

All dump trucks (large or small) and all interstate garbage trucks (the 18 wheelers with long, often open trailers) … you know, the trucks that are almost always speeding and weaving from lane to lane and almost invariably throwing rocks off their tires into your windshield when you are stuck behind them in traffic … would only be allowed to drive in the right hand lanes of all highways (if I was King I would legislate their categorical ban from all highways) and would have all their fines tripled for speeding.
 

I'm with anon 1:32 but I'll add, complete prosecution to executives getting mind blowing bonuses for essentially doing their job or getting mind blowing bonuses even for putting their company into the ground.
 

I would ban realistic vomiting scenes in TV and movies. I'm sure the middle school boy set would be disappointed for a while, but they'll get over it.
 

I am not sure what double dipping snack crackers means, but I know that here in Texas duble dipping chips is already a felony :)
 

I would like to outlaw whiiinnnnning.
 

I would make it a felony to listen to, sell, market, reproduce, distribute, or own any and all recordings made by the Kings of Leon. Thus ending our long national nightmare.
 

End Justin Bieber and Twilight.
 

I would make one teacher for every 15 students mandatory. And funding for education could never be cut.
 

Ang, let me guess...you are one of those with more than 10 items in the 10 items line! Ahahah...my time is way more precious than that of the whiiinnnning suckers who think they can count.
 

I would ban passing another car. People: you need to learn patience, and go to your mellow place by the creek and eat your imaginary picnic! Passing is dangerous and creates enmity as people raise only their middle fingers to say "Hi" as they pass me. Oh!! When they do this,they interrupt MY imaginary picnic and reverie. Perhaps a mandatory chauffeur for Renee might be a better law.
 

Any person of child bearing age who receives welfare, medicaid, food stamps, etc. must have reverseable birth control, and submit to an abortion if they become pregnant. This includes vasectomies for men. When they leave the rolls, this would be reversed.

Any person or group who opposes this would have to put up a bond equal to the amount needed to support any child resulting from these pregnancies until adulthood, including college.

I despise those that oppose abortion, birth control, etc. but won't put their money where their mouth is.
 

Bring back public flogging for the aforementioned line number offenders, double dippers of comestibles, people who hog the left lane and back up the faster traffic, and school zone speeders.

Lee
 

Not to throw a wrench in your regularly scheduled programming Osler (though Woody is not going to appreciate all these people wanting to throw him in jail for being in the 10 items or less lane with more than 10 items), but President Obama just said this while talking about the mideast:

"Our message is simple: if you take the risks that reform entails, you will have the full support of the United States...Now, we cannot hesitate to stand squarely on the side of those who are reaching for their rights, knowing that their success will bring about a world that is more peaceful, more stable, and more just."

Democracy promotion, it is back! West is best!

Immediately after this speech, Obama introduced his new foreign policy advisor, George W. Bush.
 

you're darn right, rrl! if these people were in charge, i'd have been in jail long ago, with the key long since thrown away.
personally, i'd like to jail people who cry about somebody having 12 or 13 items in the 10 item lane. it's a suggestion, not a hard and fast rule. if i have 12 items in the express lane, you better believe i don't even know i have 12, because it's a waste of time to count when you have that few items. if the person behind me wants to count, feel free.
and don't pass any cars??? completely ridiculous. it's impossible for me to go to my happy place when someone who is already in their happy place is driving 5 mph under the speed limit. you may be fine at that speed, but i am not. but rest assured, i'll only think about telling you you're no. 1 if you're going 10 or more below the speed limit.
speaking of communists, where has lane gone?? did i miss something?
(i know, lane's not technically a commie, but he's as pinko as they get on the razor.) lane, if you're out there, come back, i miss your banter with rrl.
 

And now, not entirely to rile everybody up...but how delicious!!! Since it seems we are bound to revisit Ye Olde Domino Theory ,with regards to President Obama's last speech ("support") : The United States cannot be militarily involved in more than one war at a time. The possibilities of this latest speech scare and exhaust me.
 

Oh, man...where to begin?

1. I would abolish the Department of Education (and repeal No Child Left Behind) and the Department of Homeland Security.

2. I'd eliminate a ton of military regulations, many of which have little to do with proper functioning of the military.

3. I'd amend the Constitution to make it absolutely clear that church and state are separate.

4. I'd legalize marijuana and gay marriage.

5. Finally, I would declare the Dallas Cowboys to be a terrorist organization and an illegal enterprise like the Mafia. Membership in or affiliation with such an organization would be punishable by having every Eagles fan in Philadelphia throw the object of his or her choosing at you.
 

Hi Campbell! With what would you replace the Department of Education and what would you do with Homeland Security? I'm completely in cinque with laws 3 and 4. Inquiring minds want to know.
 

OK, Campbell - we get it! If you can't beat them, ban them!

I would add the DEA to the list of abolished departments.

Lee
 

Renee,

I don't think we need a Department of Education at the federal level. I get where some sort of national standards need to apply, given the nature of our country where people move from state to state, but I don't see where we need an entire federal department for that. What works for a school in New York City or Philadelphia may not work for a school in South Carolina (where I'm from). Hell, what works for a school in a rich town like my hometown doesn't work for the poorer schools in the South Carolina lowcountry. When it comes to education, the more freedom that we can give to the local school district, the better, in my opinion. I know that's a fly-by answer - I'll be happy to follow up later if there are more questions.

Homeland Security - Good idea on paper, but in practice, it's been a big, bureaucratic waste of money. At this point, we'd be better of just abolishing it and returning the agencies falling under it to their original cabinet departments. Transportation Security Administration? Ineffective - it's all security theatre. Eliminate it entirely and let local police - as in, law enforcement professional who actually know what they're doing - take care of airport and passenger security. Coast Guard? They were doing just fine under the Department of Transportation. All Homeland Security did was create the "need" for another cabinet-level secretary and all the bureaucracy that comes with it. I supported Homeland Security at first, because I believed that the government would actually take all these police and defense organizations and streamline things by putting them under one umbrella. The reality, though, is that didn't happen - it's more red tape, in the end.

Lest anybody accuse me of being a tea-partier or something like that, I'm not - I consider myself more Democrat than Republican, honestly. But I also don't believe in bureaucracy for the sake of bureaucracy - nothing says that liberals can't support efficient government!
 

Lee - Haven't thought of that one, but not a bad idea.

I don't know if I could get behind legalizing all drugs...as much as I think drugs should be a public health issue and not a criminal law issue, Mark is absolutely right about the effects hard drugs have had on America's inner cities and its poorest citizens. But is there any reason why local and state law enforcement can't handle drug enforcement? And if marijuana were legalized, that would certainly free up a lot of police and court resources to deal with the other drug cases.

Are there any police officers out there who have experience with this and care to comment?